How do girls in the movies look so good with wet hair? When I get out of the shower I look like I was just rescued from downing and half my hair was trying to save itself by attempting escape in every direction, while the other half decided to be complacent and curl themselves away quietly, resulting in a big twisted pile on top of my head and a mix of curly, wavy, and straight pieces down below.

I understand that these girls have probably gone through a lot of styling to get their hair to look like that, but really, why set up such unrealistic standards? The media hasn’t exactly been the best influence on the self-esteems of society’s girls, but the one constant we could have all relied on was that everybody looks a mess when they stumble out of the ocean after taking a beating from the crashing waves. But thanks to popular culture and Sports Illustrated swim suit edition, we don’t even have that any more. Look at this girl, just hanging out on the yacht after a dip in the sea, showing off her tan lines and perfectly parted hair!

I would like to turn focus on just how stylists can get hair to look this way. I am willing to bet there is more than just water contributing to that look. There are probably gels, and sprays, and mousses, and waxes, and at least an hour or two of carefully mapped out strand placement. Why go to all that work to make wet hair look so good? Why not spend the same amount of time on a dry hair look? I feel like there are a lot more options with dry hair, too; curls, waves, braids, barrettes, endless possibilities, really. But no, they went for wet hair. Once again leading the average girl to think, Why am I different? Why doesn’t my hair perfectly frame my face while I stand under a waterfall? Well, congratulations media; you’ve planted one more seed of doubt in the minds of today’s youth.

Also, where did the notion of fans blowing in your hair come from? Only Beyoncé can walk away from this event without a tangled nest of hair, and that’s probably just because she has a crew of to people run in and brush her hair while our sights are redirected to a shot her fancy high heeled footwork.